Celebrating the New Year: A Journey of Renewal and Sorrow

 

As the clock hits midnight in our house, everyone chants, "Happy New Year!" The phrase represents the feeling of excitement that comes with the change of the calendar. It represents a new beginning, an opportunity to leave behind the past and welcome new opportunities.

The start of a new year confronts me with a blank canvas, full with unwritten stories, untapped possibilities, and undiscovered aspects of myself. It's a time for making resolutions, setting goals, and becoming motivated by the expectation of what's to come. As the new year begins, resolutions are set, with some reconsidering whether or not to pursue them. The promise of progress and betterment hangs in the air, pushing me to embark on personal travels.

However, among the excitement for the future, life's realities may cast a shadow over our festivities. We celebrated the New Year with my grandfather (tatang), who is striving to live forever.  It hurts me to see my beloved Lolo fighting illness when everyone else is having a good time. We're all anxious that he won't be around us to enjoy the new year. He made it till the new year, which makes us joyful because my lolo is celebrating with us. I'm always terrified that they'll message me that he's no longer with us. Unfortunately, he passed away on January 3, 2024. I considered that everything ended after my Lolo passed away. 

The death of a loved one as we begin the new year can be a sobering reminder of the fragility of life. While we recently celebrated new beginnings, we are also carrying the weight of grief and the memories of those who are no longer with us.

Lastly, "New Year, New Me" symbolizes not just the attempt for individual enhancement, but also the recognition of the intricate connection between the past, present, and future. As we enter the unknown of 2024, may we take the lessons of yesterday, the dreams of today, and the hope for a better tomorrow.

I will always miss you tang🕊️🕊️. 

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